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My adoptive father who is Nigerian wants me to have a child by a Nigerian man.? |
Travel Info Is this strange?I myself am Dominican.I never knew my biological father.I can't understand why he would only want me to have a child with a Nigerian man.Can anyone shed some light on this for me? Travel Tips This is very typical of Nigerians, i.e. the extension of their name and their tribal affiliations. I notice that you're not saying he wants you to marry a Nigerian man. Is this also the case? Usually, parents in Nigeria and most of Africa are protective of their culture and language. One way to do this is to ensure that their children marry within their (the parents') tribes. Sometimes, this is for good; other times, the parents are not thinking too well about their children. You must consider whether this is one of those requests where your adoptive father has your best interests at heart, or whether he is looking after his own links to posterity. Of course, there may be other personal issues that are more subtle - for instance, if you're in the military and your dad would like you to have a child before you go overseas...he'd like a child he can relate to more directly; or, he may just be egging you to find someone he can share some camarederie and similar background with (the Nigerian son-in-law). Best way to go is to talk to your father. Keep it simple. Tell him that it bothers you a bit that he wants you to marry a Nigerian man and that you're struggling with the idea unless he can illuminate upon his reasoning. Tell him u want things to work out for both of you in a way that everyone'll be very satisfied. P.S. I'm guessing your adoptive father is Yoruba? Others Maybe he thinks this would tie you to the man because the child would be a US citizen and you could probably help the man to get US citizenship. Don't do it. It sounds very fishy. I wouldn't say it's "fishy". He's your dad, so he cares about you. Does he have someone in mind, or is he telling you to find a Nigerian man to marry? If it is the second, then I think this is common among parents from other cultures who are proud of where they came from and want to pass on their cultures values to new generations. Even though you are not Nigerian, he is, so he probably just has a bias towards his own people. Many Indians want their children to marry other Indians, some African-Americans want their children to marry other black people, etc. |
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