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What did your mother teach you?

Travel Info
1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
'If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

Travel Tips

Our mothers went to the same parenting school I see.They also taught us Purpose in life."If you carry on like this,you will become a street sweeper."
She also taught me what Omnipotence is. "When I say it is time,then it will be !!"
Others

here's a star!!!!!!
did we have the some mother.
Brilliant ....
Mothers teach you stuff that you can never learn anywhere else...
I've heard this one before but it' always makes me smile. It's a real classic. And a mother is a wonderful and precious gift.
Good one.
Makes me miss my mom